Birthday Reflections

This year's birthday was just a little different than last year's. ManLosch took us out for dinner last night. This was Jovie's first real time being out and of course I was nervous (yes everyone says not to take your kid out much this early, but our pediatrician said 'what do you think second time moms do??'). We stayed local and went to a restaurant where the family who owns it knows us because we frequent their diner most Sundays after Mass.

The restaurant was crowded but the music was great and Jovie slept the ENTIRE time. The first song I heard was our first dance song so we silently jammed to it. Then we ordered and talked about how different this year was from last year. Last year I was able to fit into all of my clothes and alot of my work friends came over to party. My best friend Marcus and I got drunk and made that lovely "To Be Real" video that I posted. As we were talking about that, "To Be Real" started playing in the restaurant and I kept looking at Jovie to make sure she wasn't fussy. ManLosch kept saying, "She's fine, I promise." Instead of double fisting drinks, I had a small glass of Prosecco in one hand and a pacifier in the other. Last year, Marcus surprised me by coming up from New York and ManLosch helped organize it. This year, ManLosch organized a surprise party for me at the house and everyone brought food and helped with Jovie. I got a $25 Fandango gift card from a co-worker who also said that babysitting services come with the deal so ManLosch and I can get out. Last year, I got tons of liquor, an XS t-shirt from "Glee" and a Flip videocamera. The videocamera is now pretty much the Jovie cam. Last year, I had a nice outfit on and got to go to work and be with friends. This year, I was home in pajamas where Jovie projectile vomitted all over me, the living room chair, herself, and the dog and then peed on me later.

It was funny to look back on just how different last year was to this year. We had a good time talking about it and laughing about the differences. Even though this birthday was dramatically different, I had a WONDERFUL birthday and I definitely felt loved. :-)

Merry Christmas!!

Merry Christmas! I hope everyone had a wonderful day with family or friends. It certainly doesn't feel like Christmas but it's not so bad. I think I'm finally getting used to being a real mom now. Jovie is a fussy little girl but then again, she's just like her mom. More to come, but enjoy the holiday!

Where Ya Been?

I've been mothering a child the last 5-6 days! That's right. Preggo fatty no more. I gave birth to a 7lb 2oz little bundle of tantrum named Jovie Sophia Losch. So about 98% of you all were wrong; I totally had a girl. It was kinda funny actually to hear everyone's reactions to the fact that we had a girl.

More updates and deets to come later. For now, I'm just slowly starting to catch up on everything, including my sanity. :-)

Listless Losch

I stayed home from work on Thursday and Friday because well....I about had an emotional breakdown in my doctor's office on Thursday. Everything was fine, checked out ok, but for some reason, as the nurse was taking my vitals and she asked me how I was doing, I just burst into tears. She told me to lay down before the doctor came in and ManLosch rubbed my back while I sobbed. The doctor came in and rubbed my back too, reassured me that it was ok. She recommended working half days until my maternity leave if necessary, but that definitely, I should go home that day. Of course it didn't help when she did the exam and told me it didn't look like I was going to go early. Cue more tears.

My boss has been AWESOME and told me to not even worry about work and to stay home Friday too. Here's what I realized: BEING HOME WAITING FOR YOUR UNBORN CHILD TO DECIDE TO MAKE ITS APPEARANCE SUCKS. I did sleep alot, which was good. But I cried alot too. LoschDog has been great and nuzzling and cuddling with me for the last 4 days. 2 of my co-workers, Ann and Ryan, stopped by with lunch on Friday so I wouldn't talk to the wall anymore. ManLosch has been great when he's home and has taken care of me. He even took me shopping Friday night to buy 2 more shirts to cover my ever-growing belly for these last few weeks and then went to Olive Garden.

I've had no energy and no real desire to do anything but take my ass to the hospital and start pushing. I have dreams every night about labor which also doesn't help the fact that I don't get alot of sleep. But I think I'm safe to finally head back in for these last few days. I like the social interaction of being at work and I feel useful there. Hopefully, I don't go TOO late, but I know, I know. I have no say in that. :)

All I Want For Christmas.....

(besides the birth of my baby?)......is this....

Yes....I want the Obama Chia.

Throwback to the 90's

Our newer car (don't know that I'd call it a new car anymore, but it's almost 3 months old) has satellite radio in it. Just like the regular radio, sometimes there's never anything on that you want to listen to. Driving home tonight, I was tuned into the 90's station. Some of the songs brought back very vivid memories of my teenage somewhat angsty years. Here's what I experienced on the 15 minute car ride home:

"You Oughta Know" by Alanis Morrissette: I remember being in middle school. I just bought Alanis Morissette's album on a cassette tape as I was not rich enough to purchase anything that looked like a CD at the time. So I had a hand-me-down Walkman that I loved. My mom and I were living with my aunt and my cousin in their apartment for the time being, so I remember falling asleep on my makeshift bed listening to this thinking "Wow, are women really this angry? And why would she ask a man if he was thinking of her while he screwed another woman? She sounds pissed." I would rewind, stop, hit play....nope, not at the beginning yet. Rewind...stop....hit play. I did this so many times that I went through batteries like it was nobody's business.

Fast forward through time and HOLY SHIT Alanis. You were right. Women really ARE this angry at men sometimes. And it's ok. It's funny how things don't make sense when you're too young to understand what it all really means.

"You Make Me Wanna" by Usher: I was in high school. The year before this song came out, I helped one girl get together with a guy she really liked. The guy I really liked ALOT became taken, but that's another heartbreak story. Fastfoward a year and the guy and girl are having problems. I try to remain neutral. We end up walking home together because we lived in the same area and I needed someone to walk home with. Little did I know, he started to like me, but at the same time, he was breaking up with his girlfriend.....for me (how do we have so much fuckin drama in high school, jeeeeeeez). A few weeks later, we slowly started dating and I was in love. Until the next year when he broke up with me stating the reason, "I'm just not in love with you anymore." He also broke up with me over AOL Chat (remember AOL chat??) instead of being a man about it. It's ok though. He actually turned out to be gay later on down the road (how MUCH later, I have no idea....) and I think he's happily engaged now to another guy. Good for you. You still suck for being immature.


I love little moments that conjure of memories of the past.

Important! Open Immediately!

5 December 2010

Attn: Mr./Ms. Baby Losch:

This is your official eviction notice. You will have 2 weeks to vacate the premises with all of your belongings and management would prefer if you were able to leave earlier.

Reasons for Eviction:
You signed a 9 month lease and you have yet to pay for ONE month.
Utilities were included and you have abused this privilege (entertainment, heat, water, etc.).
Food was built into the rent, however you have not PAID rent.
You keep other tenants and management up during the night with your Dance Dance Revolution parties.
Your expectations of the building are a little too high, considering you don't PAY RENT.
Your field goal practicing during the day has put a damper on other activities.

Please consider yourself on notice. If you do not comply, further action will be taken.

Regards,
Management

Holidaaaaaaay

My company holiday party is tonight and unfortunately, this time, I won't be coming home dirty drunk like I did last year. I had a BLAST last year. But I think I'll have a blast this year too. I'm actually very excited. I was thinking of bringing a flask of apple juice to take shots of apple juice.

I'll post some pictures later, with me and all my preggo glory.

Things That Freak Me Out

There are things that just freak or skeeve me out. Very random things sometimes.

1) People who don't like chicken. C'mon. This is not just a black thing.
2) People who don't believe in using lotion to moisturize.
3) The dude that works at my company who walks around with no shoes sometimes.
4) The women at my company who can't seem to keep our restroom clean and literally not full of shit.
5) Women who enjoy pregnancy.
6) Anyone who doesn't understand the concept of personal space. Please, you do not need to tell me your story 2 inches from my body. Back it up a few feet.
7) 10 lb infants.
8) Lint. (especially on sheets....ew...it's just...ugh....no.....can't do it)
9) Man thumbs.
10) Spiders (or any bugs for that matter).
11) That speck of white spit some people get on their lips when talking and it just doesn't go away and it attaches itself to both lips and stretches, and ewwwwwww. Yea.
12) The notion that dinosaurs could make a return and be really pissed off (more specifically, T-Rexes).

I'm A Terrible Catholic

ManLosch and I went to Mass today (which is the norm for a Sunday morning for us if you haven't caught on by now). I finally settled my preggosaurus ass in the pew and ManLosch asked me "Do you want the book?"

See, I love the book. The book has all the songs and all of the readings. So while the lector reads, I read the book...and yes sometimes I read ahead. Because I'm 5 years old and I make more of a connection when I'm able to read while listening. Also, this is just an excuse for me to say that I heard the readings and gospel because I already read it.

So back to the book. Advent started today which makes it a new liturgical year (BAM! I learned something ya'll....bust it). We got new books. Brand new spanking books. Which means the kids haven't coughed on them, or colored in them with their crayons. I opened it, all happy to follow along, and wait...a...minute. What is this? Why is there only a synopsis of the reading AND NOT THE FULL READING?!?! WTF?! I quickly showed it to ManLosch and shrugged my shoulders indicating a sort of "What is going on" emotion. He said, "It's the reading, see where they listed Isaiah and the number at the top? It's just a short summary, not the whole reading." Immediate response? "This is bullshi-nezzzzzz." And somewhat loudly. ManLosch's eyes widened like "no this b*tch did not just curse in church." But I said, "WHAT? I said bullishnezz."

I think I'm going to have to find my own "Breaking Bread" book and bring it to church with me that has the entire readings. I won't survive Mass without the book! Okay, maybe I will. But I won't like it.

4 1/2 More Weeks

Lately, I haven't really had much to blog about, so I didn't want to just post that I had nothing to post about. This pregnancy has really taken a toll on my energy level. One thing that I found that really helped one of the pains I'd been experiencing is prenatal yoga. Just in one sitting doing some hip openers, the pain in my hips lightened up. I did a little yoga tonight as well. Had some trouble doing downward facing dog, so I will have to wait for ManLosch to get home to help me a little until I am comfortable with all those positions on my own.

Another side effect of pregnancy? My dreams have become A LOT more vivid. Now, this isn't necessarily a bad thing. But it can be distracting. Certain images are longer lasting than others and some are more "colorful" than others. This is actually something I don't mind, but I do mind when it's so vivid that it wakes me up in the middle of the night. I guess we can't have everything.

4 1/2 more weeks.....I am counting down the time. I'm very anxious but very excited. I'm alot of feelings all rolled into one, if that makes any sense.

How I Spent My Weekend

1) Watching back-to-back episodes of "In Living Color" on one of the channels I forgot we had. I keep forgetting that we have a ton of channels that aren't HD, so it was a real treat to find that gem on Friday night while ManLosch was dining with architects from Hahhhhvahhhhd.

2) Sleeping. Eating. Watching "Coming to America."

3) Attending a breastfeeding class. I learned how a baby should latch onto my breast by watching a hand puppet baby seal and a fake breast and nipple that had a pull string attached to the back to also demonstrate inverted nipples. Not funny considering one of Ryan's friend's that day told me we could be having a baby seal instead of a human. This class was alot better than the childbirth education class, but of course, it's not the real deal. So I guess I'll find out soon. We did get 2 hours of entertainment though just by watching the woman repeatedly and excitedly latch onto the stuffed boob/nipple herself with her own mouth.

4) Eating Legal Sea Foods. Yummmmmmmmmmm. I had a very happy tummy.

5) Church at 8am. The priest made his gender prediction after it was over. He said a boy and thinks I'm going early.

6) Outlets, Ikea, and Costco. Found Snickers Cheesecake from Cheesecake Factory at Costco. Began pawing the freezer door until ManLosch placed a box in the cart. I also found a very rideable kids' pony in the toy section and may or may not have had a field day with it.

So in other words....I spent my weekend very well. :-)

Indeed Those 6 Words

I'm finishing up a book called, "I'm Sorry You Feel That Way" by Diana Joseph (who, by the way, I had the chance to hear read an excerpt from this book back in March). I'm on the last chapter and she is describing the moment she tried to tell her then-husband that she wasn't happy and wanted out of the marriage. His response to her was "I'm sorry you feel that way." I'd like to quote what she wrote next:

"..I'm sorry you feel that way. The I'm sorry part makes it sound like a generous sentiment, empathetic and understanding, but when you think about it, it's really a load of crap. It really means What you feel is stupid and wrong but the reason you feel that way is because, regrettably, you're stupid and wrong. I think it's so much more honest to say fuck you, Up yours. Who cares. What's that got to do with me? Too bad, so sad. So what. Whoop de do. Foo on you. Big deal. Bite me. You're full of shit. You don't know your ass from a hole in the ground. Tough titty. No, really, fuck you."

I'm not sure why this paragraph hit me so hard, but OMG DAMN! How true is this. In reality, really...think about it. How many times has someone sarcastically told you they were sorry? Or maybe they said this to you but used different words and it made you feel lower than low. You think, "Damn why didn't you just say what you really meant!"  I've had people tell me this, or express this somehow and it's definitely made me feel like this. That "you really don't give a shit, so why bother" kind of feeling.

Sorry, just had to share this portion of the book since it really just resonated with me. :)

Lovely Little Losch

Baby is head down!!! I repeat, baby is HEAD DOWN!!!
My little Peanut is getting ready just like his/her mama is getting ready for all of this life changing-ness.

I was at work today and thinking to myself, "Holy crap, this body, my body is sustaining a LIFE! And that life has a healthy heartbeat and kicks ManLosch when ManLosch pokes my belly." It was this strange, surreal moment. And then I talked to Esperanza and she about said the same thing. These are the last few weeks that I'll ever have alone with my husband again, but I think we're ready for that. And I'm ok with that. :-)

Monitors and Scales

I have another doctor's appointment tomorrow. I've been going every 2 weeks now. In less than a month, I'll be going every week. It's a little scary. Especially when a co-worker informed me that I could miss the work Christmas party because I could totally be 3 weeks early like her son was.

The appointments don't last long, just all the basics. I'm starting to get extremely uncomfortable now. My ankles are swelling. Sitting is uncomfortable, standing is uncomfortable, everything is just uncomfortable. It's awful. It's driving me insane. ManLosch is letting me get a massage next week to help with the back pain and the hip pain. Anxiety is setting in now. I'm nowhere near ready, but I am all in one.

How many more weeks of this??

New Direction!

As sad as it may seem....I think my blog may be taking a new direction shortly. There are so many life changes happening right now that I think I want to see my blog move in a new direction now. There will still be ranting and raving.....but just a little different. :)

And I still love you.

I Laugh A Little Inside

Did alot of baby shopping today. Second stop was Target. Since my bladder is the size of a pin head, I had to pee again. So as I waddled to the ladies room and picked a stall, I noticed that a little boy was in the restroom waiting for his mom. He was very chatty but this is what made me laugh:

• Mom: Mommy's tummy hurts a little, that's why we're still in here, ok?
• Son: OKAY!
• Mom: We might need to get Mommy a new tummy.
• Son: Hmm. Like one with a baby in it??.
• Mom: No, no. Not that kind of tummy.

The woman was essentially broadcasting to the entire ladies restroom that she was taking a shit and it was a bad one. But all the poor kid wanted was a little brother or sister. I thought it was funny that he thought you could just buy new tummies and that babies are an accessory with said tummy. Is this what I have to look forward to?

Cat-astrophe

This past weekend, ManLosch and I were back in the burbs of Chicago for a baby shower thrown by his mother and sisters. It was a quick trip. Our flight on Sunday was leaving at 7:45am and one sister (Erica) actually lives in Chicago, so we stayed with her and her hubs (James) Saturday night.

Well her and the hubs have cats named Guinness and Bailey. Very adorable cats; I love using his pointer to project that little red dot everywhere and watch them go crazy. At about 5:15am Sunday, ManLosch helped me get in the shower, as their tub is a little high for a fatty preggo to get into. Once he helped me in, he walked out and thought he closed the door, but left it cracked. About 10 seconds later, there's a shadow walking between the curtain and the liner and I screamed. It was a cat. A cat had jumped onto the tub. I started yelling, "RYYYYYYYAAANNNNN!!! THERE'S A CAT IN THE TUB, A CAAAAAT IN THE TUBBBBBBB!!!!!!" He ran in just as the cat was rounding the corner to actually JOIN me in the shower. With the cat successfully shoo'ed away, I was able to finish up. Apparently I had also probably woken up half of their apartment building. :-) James is convinced that it was payback for the laser pointer.

Oops. Sorry about that Erica and James. I hope your neighbors forgive me.

The Big 3-0

Dear World,

I am 30 weeks pregnant. This shit is INSANE. Freak out begins soon. I can't believe I'm in the third trimester let alone 30 weeks. I remember when I was anxious just to get to 20. And now I'm already 30??? Jeeeeez. I keep chanting "almost there, almost there" especially when I find it hard to not be out of breath and just finish a sentence. But yea. CRAAAAAZY.

Sincerely,
LaLosch

Childbirthing Class

Yes, I went to the childbirthing class. It was not the goodies. Ryan and I went this past Saturday from 9am-6pm. Do they show the gruesome videos? Yes.
Was it long and boring? Yes.
Did we have to change diapers on ridiculous dolls? Yes. (They also had some weird marker drawings on their heads)
Did my heart melt from its "i hate all kids" icy state? Mmm, not really, BUT I did some see newborns that were born the day before the class. It was kinda cute and touched my icy little heart a bit.

But the best part? The best part was when the husband of one of the preggos started smoking. Around all the other pregnant women there too. Just lit up like it wasn't a problem. Um HELLO?!?! I wanted to smack the shit out of him. If there's one thing I'm adamant about during this pregnancy, is not being around smokers. I have the occasional soda, and indulge in my favorite sandwich sometimes. But cmon buddy, your own wife is pregnant and you just smoke around her day and night? FAIL.

By George I Think She's Got It!

Got what you ask?

THE CURE FOR ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING.

Recently, while at the Dollar Store (one of my most favorite places EVER), we stocked up on some disinfecting wipes. They are called "Brillo" wipes. As I pulled one wipe out the other night, I couldn't help but notice what kinds it viruses it claims to kill. Ladies and Gentlemen.....these wipes claim to kill:

HIV-1(also known as the AIDS virus)

SARS

Avian Flu

Athletes Foot

Don't worry, it also boasts that it'll kill alot more than just that!!

There are also instructions on the container on how to go about killing HIV. Please wear gloves while you do it (that's what she said) and a face mask.

The Dollar Store has been carrying our answer to all the great medical mysteries.The freaking Dollar Store. So go out and get you some Brillo Disinfecting Wipes. They will change your life. Perhaps find your soul mate for you while you clean your kitchen counter. Maybe dunk one in your cup of tea to get rid of that nasty cold. I'm JUST sayin......

Ummmm Yeeaaa

There's a commercial for something called a Fuzzoodle.

https://www.buyfuzzoodles.com/Default.aspx

Uhhh.....so.....it's a pipe cleaner....that serves the same purpose as a Mr. Potato Head, but Mr. Potato Head is way cooler????????

Hm. Well then. I feel as if my time has just been wasted. Thanks.

Help Out Our Friends!

If you're interested in doing a good thing, all I'm asking you to do today is vote. What is it for, you ask? Well I'll tell you bitches. It's for research and helping babies with cystic fibrosis through Pepsi. Now I know what you're saying. "I don't even LIKE Pepsi and Lexi wants me to vote...." Yes. Yes I am. The top 2 ideas receive $250,000. Right now, this idea/grant is only at #3 and voting goes for another 8 days!!! You know you want to vote. Just for me. If you do, I'll be super happy and it'll make utero BabyLosch happy for another baby. It's like some weird baby kindred spirit thing.
So just do it. I'll love you forever and ever and ever. And did I say ever? :)

Commuting Sucks

I hate driving to work. That's really about it. They've been doing construction on my street since June and it backs up traffic and people get rancid and then I get extra rancid and it's just not a good situation for anyone. I'd rather stay home and work.

I Don't Know You But...

I watched the Today show this morning while eating breakfast. I just turned the tv on to check the weather very quickly but then one of the stories caught my eye. A woman named Erin Wood just recently lost her husband. They are expecting their first child in November. He steered their car directly into the crash to take the entire impact of the crash while shielding her. He sacrificed his own life for his wife's and their unborn child. They didn't even know if it's a boy or girl.
http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/39146785/ns/today-today_people/

So I'm watching them interview her and I just start bawling. ManLosch comes in the living room and asks what's wrong and I just point. If you read the article, then you'll read that they found heroin, cocaine, and marijuana in the car that caused the crash. It also killed the 2 guys in the backseat. This story just stuck with me all day. I re-told it at work and everytime I did, I almost started crying again. She mentioned that she just tries to keep eating right and taking care of herself to distract her from the pain of losing him; that he'd want her to take care of the baby. Enter MORE tears.

Erin Wood, I don't know you, but I am praying for you and your family. Your husband reminds me of mine, which probably made me cry even harder. I can't even imagine that kind of pain and I know there's nothing anyone can say or do right now that will make it better. But please know that this stranger over here in Boston has you and your baby in her prayers and hopes that others will too.

Meet the Doctors

There was an event tonight at the hospital where I have all of my prenatal care done. It was called "Meet the Doctors" so you can meet all of the doctors in this group of physicians that can possibly be on call when you go into labor. Obviously, one of them is your OB/GYN, but they like you to meet the others and ask questions. It was a pretty packed auditorium. ManLosch was unable to come with me, but it did not stop me from going.

I did send him a text that said, "Wow there's alot of preggos here." He said, "Um, what did you expect?" I said, "Well I know but still. It's alot." You could definitely tell you were in a room with all pregnant women because all you heard were snack bags opening and crunching and the guzzling of water. It reminded me a little of this:

Also, it was like being in high school again. All the pregnant women checking out each other's bellies, wondering how far along the other one is, pointing, mumbling. It was a bit much for me. WAY too much estrogen for me. I'm way too much estrogen for me, so imagine being in a room full of preggos. I overheard this conversation happen:

Wife: Ok, watch my bag, I have to pee.

Husband: Wait, where are you going?

Wife: I said I had to pee.

Husband: AGAIN?!

Dear husbands.......YES AGAIN. If you haven't gotten in through your skulls yet that we pee alot and can't help it, I don't know what to tell you at this point. ManLosch doesn't even glance twice when I'm up and about peeing like 20 times a day. I don't even know if I have control of my own bladder anymore. Anyway, back to this event. It was actually nice. Except for the 2 year old kicking my seat behind me (get used to it huh?) and screaming the entire time. Otherwise, it was informative and I feel alot more confident about the network of doctors we may be dealing with come December. I also got to talk one-on-one with my doctor which was nice because I L-O-V-E her. She gave me some advice until I see her again. 

It's amazing how time is flying by!

109 Days Left

Either the horrible vent at work made me sick or ManLosch did. I started to feel it Friday afternoon and I've been down with a cold ever since. Sunday was the worst of the days and today at least, I feel a little better.

I've got 109 days left to go! I can't wait for this kid to get here. I don't think I'm cut out for the pregnancy business. I am very excited to be a mother though. So even though everyone loves to give me their advice with "Just wait until the kid gets here, you REALLY won't get any sleep," I kinda don't care. Not that your advice isn't welcome, but I already know this. It still doesn't negate the fact that RIGHT NOW, the child in utero kicks me all day and all night and prevents me from sleeping as well as I used to. But again, I already know that my life is going to change dramatically. Maybe because I've been through so many life changes already, that I am welcoming this change with open arms now. Yeah I'll be tired and cranky and not as available. But I knew all that would happen. So suck on that world.

Otherwise, this Labor Day weekend has been slightly uneventful, mainly due to the fact that I've not been feeling great. ManLosch will hopefully finish the crib next weekend. And we may have more updates later, but well...we'll see how everything goes this week. :-)

Been On The Quiet Side

Yea, that's me. I've been fairly quiet on the blogging end. I've just been either really busy or really tired. Such is life. Everyone will move on and get over it!

So let's see, updates...updates. We've started our registry. I don't even think we have everything, but I dunno. If we don't, I'm sure someone will tell us. ManLosch has painted the baby's room as well and we've already moved a ton of furniture. We've given away alot and it's amazing how far we've come since April. He also started building the crib this past Sunday. He designed it and is building it from scratch with one of my co-workers who is helping. He's loving it.

KidLosch is also now in the business of kicking me. ALOT. Like all night and all day. This is one restless little child, just like his/her dad. It woke me up at 3am the other evening and we both decided it was a good time to snack. Might as well take advantage of the time I'm awake, right? As I type this blog, the little one is kicking me. In the beginning it was cool, but now I'm like "Will this kid EVER stop?" I think the answer is NO. Baby thinks I'm a punching bag.

I'm also gaining weight, which is good, but I'm not used to all this extra weight, so my body is freaking out just a bit. I'm still tiny though, don't expect to see a Fatty McLosch. But for ME....it's more weight than I'm used to. Ah well. Almost 16 more weeks to go!!

Getting Ready

I was on a rampage yesterday. I was a cleaning machine. I basically cut my closet in half and filled 2 more bags to donate to Goodwill. I stored clothes that don't fit right now, and my closet looks AMAZING. When I usually clean like this, I play some music. ManLosch was also cleaning. We're basically getting ready for the little one and the slow beginnings of the baby room is happening.

So we're cleaning, right? And I realized I had some Miami songs on. And one of our "get ready for a football game" songs came on. This time it wasn't "In The Air Tonight." It was good ole' Trick Daddy with "Let's Go." Sorry, but I have a feeling that you may only truly understand that if you're from the 305 or went to UM. Because really, no one walks around boasting a likeness of Trick Daddy. So we started to get pumped up for some UM football. I even tried on my jersey (which barely fits over my belly now). But I couldn't help it. I did the unthinkable.

Yes. I brought the stereo closer to my belly and played Trick Daddy for my baby.
I HAVE TO START KIDLOSCH EARLY!! It's great...to be...a Miami Hurricane!! I heart college football.

Random Thoughts While Driving

I was driving to work yesterday and ended up behind this shuttle bus thing. The company is called "M&L Transit." I've seen this before and it's got a picture of a lion on it. So as I'm getting closer, I have this revelation.

That revelation is "OMG, it totally means Mouse and Lion Transit."  That totally makes sense. Well I get a little closer and I realize that the lion's mouth looks like he's wearing lipstick. His mouth is all red. So........uh...did he eat the mouse??

I google'd this company and found out that it stands for "Michael and Lisa," the people who started the company. So what's with the red mouth on the lion?? Anyone?

Why Do I Watch This SH*T?!

Please someone tell me why I'm watching "Inside Edition." I've never actually watched it, but decided since I was being lazy tonight, I'd just leave the tv on where it was when we turned it off this morning. And I just had to share these headlines and stories with you:

"Who is that celebrity walking the streets in a tiger mask? We'll tell you!!"

"Why are there zebras running loose in Sacramento? We'll tell you!"

"Why is this beautiful model walking with a bandage on her leg? Kelly Schwartz, winner of Frank The Entertainer's reality show (side note: ya'll VH1 has got to stop with these reality crap shows) had the worst experience ever shaving. She cut herself shaving and a fly landed on her leg and laid eggs in the wound. Over the course of a few days, she was wondering why she was in so much pain and the lump was getting bigger and more red. She went to the emergency room where the doctors couldn't believe what they saw!"

Ya'll....I am NOT making this shit up.

Shorty Got Low....

I spoke to my 7 year niece today on the phone. She also loves her some Uncle ManLosch. More than me I think. My sis-in-law just had another bambina, so check out the convo between us.

• Me: Hi Kayla, how are you?
• Kayla (my niece): Fine! Where's Uncle Ryan??
• Me: He's not home yet. How do you like being a big sister now? How many days have you been a big sister?
• Kayla: I like it. She's 7 days old now. She looks like my Mommy.
• Me: Wow. Look at you big sister. You look like your Mommy too. Did you get her any presents?
• Kayla: Nuh uh, I look like my Daddy! Yes, I got her..um..one of those..um, one piece things. And uh, something else.
• Me: Did you get any gifts too for being a big sister?
• Kayla: Yes! I got Applebottom jeans from my Daddy.
• Me: Did you get boots with the fur too??
• Kayla: Ummmm......huh???

Paint!

ManLosch is slowly understanding my gradual nesting behaviors and we will finally buy some paint this weekend for KidLosch's room!
Happy lady over here. :-)

Otherwise, I know I haven't been around much, my mom has been in town these last 2 weeks, helping out, cooking, etc. She leaves tomorrow, so life returns to normal for her and for us. She'll be back in October for the shower. I know Jordan will miss having the company. She brushed him daily and he loved waking her up by nosing open her door every morning to lick her.

Back to the norm...

LaLosch Faces Her Fears

I have alot of irrational fears. One of them being that my baby will be bald when it comes out (i DID say irrational......). But another one of them involves the public restrooms. So if you don't want to read about my restroom fears, stop reading now.

So as all you women know, whenever we need to use the ladies room, there is usually a line. So I was waiting to use a stall in the Natick mall yesterday and one opened up and the one right next to it opened up too, so my mom went in that one. The minute I stepped in, I was hit with waves (not just one), of other-stinky-person's-poop. Like this women must have just eaten at the food court upstairs and then exploded. So I could barely breathe and then it hit me: Wonder if the next person who comes in after me thinks it was ME?!?!?! Because I didn't do it, all I have to do is empty my pea sized bladder (thanks KidLosch). It smelled so bad that it wasn't even like the next person could ignore it...it was lingering even in the toilet paper.

So I came out and so did my mom and SHE said, "Man, the woman before me blew it UP!!" I said, "No that was the girl before me in my stall." And we literally argued back and forth about whose stall was worse. We came to the conclusion that they were also a mother-daughter duo who instead of tinkling, just ate Sarku Japan instead and duo dumped. But still, people might think it was me! I will reiterate that I KNOW this is irrational, but you can't tell me that you haven't thought the same thing.

I Have The Best Friends

So far, this has been the best reaction to the news:

Why I Love My Mom

I love my mom because she buys our kid things like this:

New Yorkers. What can I say? (not much since I technically am one)

I've missed her and I'm glad she's always gotten my sense of humor. :-)

Achoo

Getting sick.....SUCKS!
I hope it's just allergies or a quick passing. I can't afford to get a cold. I'm already emotional and tired. I don't need a runny nose too. I think part of it is stress, so I need to cut this shit out, seriously. I did rest already tonight and once I have dinner, it's probably back to bed for me. So much for writing....

Hail To The Spirit of...Lady Gaga??

In case you've really been in the dark here, I was in marching band in college. And I still follow the happenings of my band, whose name is "The Band of The Hour." Imagine my surprise when I find out today that 3/4 of the first half-time show will be a trio of Lady Gaga songs (Pokerface, Bad Romance, and Just Dance). 

Hmm....I mean, I'm not saying that our rendition of Justin Timberlake's "Rock Your Body" was that great, but uh.....well....yea. Either way, I'll still support it. I'll try at least. I just hope that my successors will make up some awesome alternative lyrics to some of these songs.

Infant Architecture

Benefits of having an architect husband?

He designs a crib and then places possible furniture in 2 different rooms in a design software (Sketch-Up) in our apartment to show me what it'll look like so we can decide which room to use as the baby's room. He measured the rooms and built the rooms in the software so there is no guessing how much space there will be.


Yeaaaa.....back off bitches. He's mine. ;-)

Found My Way To Relaxation

The last few days of this week have been filled with mounting frustration and anxiety. So much, that Thursday evening I spent most of it crying. I cried Friday morning because my bra didn't fit anymore, and then I almost broke down into tears at my desk at work because I didn't feel like getting up again to get my second juice box (thank you Jared for getting it for me). So ManLosch told me, "I'll do whatever I need to do to make you happy and sane this weekend, you just let me know."

So ManLosch found me a beach! I told him that it'd been too long since my feet had felt some sand, so he drove me around until we found an acceptable beach. My biggest gripe? It fucked up my hair, but whatever. And people just smoke on the beach (hmm..not a Miami thing, THAT'S for sure...). Not cool. But it was nice out today. After that, he paid for me to have a pre-natal massage. I told him afterwards that I think I may have fallen in love with a woman because my massage therapist was great. I will be booking more appointments with her to keep my shoulders from locking and to keep my back from getting all tight. She said now that all my weight is being shifted to the front, plus sitting at a computer all day, I'm going to really need to work on my back.

After that, we spent our last volunteering evening with the kitties. I can't help as much as I used to (can't do the litter and have to watch the kitty tushies) so we figured that it's only going to get worse. We had a great night; there were 3 kittens there tonight who were absolutely amazing. With the kitties being taken care of, we left to pick up dinner. ManLosch made me a steak dinner while I got to put my feet up and relax. He then brought me ice cream and rubbed my belly.

I've not cried once today. ;-)

Frustration

My frustration today comes in many forms. I'm not sure where to start with it, or even if I should blog about any of it. I did realize though, that part of my frustration is writer's block. Or maybe no motivation? I keep thinking about it and wanting to write; I have pieces that are half written, and pieces that I've started and just stopped. I felt this wave of emotion and frustration while walking to my car after work and I feel like my brain was moving with words, and I had the urge to write, but it was almost like I didn't know how. It was strange.

I question whether or not this is something I can try to force. I might. I miss it. Especially after a day like today.

Beginning of the Updates

I had my monthly visit today and met the OB/GYN for the first time (I usually see my nurse practitioner or the ultrasound people). She is tons of amazing and I love her and will do something strange like invite her over to dinner or something. So as we're talking, she basically gives me a new due date. I'm due Christmas Eve now, which was actually my original due date. What a great little Christmas present. :-) We heard the fetal heartbeat and it's very strong, so Peanut is chillin in there, growing and continuing to give me gas.

Part of all the early pregnancy shtuff involves blood tests for abnormalities, etc. Luckily so far, I am low risk for everything possible, which is great. The only thing they want to test is ManLosch for the sickle cell trait (just in case). I knew I had it and it came up in my bloodwork, but only the trait (more common in African Americans). Since we're having a little mulatto Oreo, it almost makes it safer, but just to check, the doctors wanted to test him too. ManLosch despises needles but I told him that if I could fill up 9 vials of blood everytime I went, he could fill up one for me. So after the visit, he goes to register to get his blood taken. He says, "So will this test determine if I'm black or not?" I said, "WHAT?!" He said, "You know. Maybe I'm black or something and didn't know it. Wonder if the test results come back and the doctors say 'We have good news and bad news. The bad news is, you have the trait. The good news is, you can play for the Chicago Bulls.'"

Yes. That is my husband. But at least he's doing everything he can to keep me sane. :-)

Otherwise, everything is going well so far. Just hungry all the time. Anyone wanna UltraFeast with me??

Don't Be Nasty

I normally try NOT to blog about work.....but....


Dear Ladies of Our Office,

Please flush once for the bulk and twice for the remainder. And to think, I used to think it was those women at the other company when we shared a restroom before our office move. Now that we don't? I know that it's ya'll. And ya'll are actin' REAL dirty. Let's get it together please. Because with restroom behaviors like this, you can't ever say ANYTHING about men being gross.

Sincerely,
LaLosch

Tales from Diamond Nails

Since bending over is becoming a little more difficult now (that's what she said), I opted to go and get a pedicure today rather than try to paint my toes myself and be completely out of breath by the time I was applying a base coat. There is a nail salon right across the street from my apartment, so that's where I went.

I walked in and they took me right away (good sign). But then 2 of the women who worked there looked at me and laughed a little. I shot them a look and struggled to get in the chair but got up just fine. Just paranoid. The women proceeded to do all the pedi actions and while cleaning up my cuticles, SHE KNICKED ME. I yelped a little and looked down and there was blood. I shot her a look like, "BITCH WTF JUST HAPPENED?!" and she giggled like she was Sailor Moon and said "Oh, I sorry! OMG I SORRY!" Sorry doesn't cut it whore. But apparently you do. Giving me a pedicure without cutting me would have been great.

She gets to the part where she massages my feet, which did feel nice. But then she pulled out some Mr. Miyagi moves on the bottoms of my feet and thought she was fuckin' Muhammad Ali using my legs as punching bags. I again shot her a look and decided that every time she domestically abused me, a little bit of her tip went back into my wallet.

When my toes were done, I decided too that I looked like I was growing a yeti above my eyes, so I got them shaped and waxed. As I got up to go to the room, the same 2 women who laughed before laughed again and this time, mentally deducted the tip instead of shooting the "don't go there" look. The woman who waxed my brows? She got wax IN MY HAIR and ripped a few strands out and didn't seem bothered by it. Not even when I was almost in tears and had my hand in the wax in my hair, trying to reduce the pain. Tip is now almost at $0.

Luckily, she finished quickly and my dog was done at the groomers, so I let my nails air dry. I paid the exact amount and for both those bitches, I left $5, which I felt was being generous after the shit parade they put me through. I'm not sure I'm going back there, but I think I'll be able to find another nail place with no problems, don't you think?

Lord of the Pants

What will I be doing this weekend you ask?

Looking to buy more maternity pants. Because they are the best thing to happen to me. Ever. Well besides ManLosch, the dog (who I now affectionately just call "Animal"), and the little one. Maternity pants are pretty much up there. Way up there. So I decided while eating an italian ice and letting it all drip onto my belly, "Dammit, I'm gonna buy another pair of pants!"

That is all.

What Did You Eat Before Bed??

• ManLosch(while watching tv during breakfast at the hotel): Is that Lady Gaga?
• Me: No, that's not Lady Gaga. Duh.
• ManLosch: Hmm. Isn't she dead?
• Me: WHAT? Whaaaa? Lady Gaga is not dead dummy.
• ManLosch: Oh. Well maybe I just dreamt that she was dead. Ah, oh well.

Vacation!!!!

Vacation starts tomorrow! And it's well deserved. After a trip to the ER Tuesday night/Wednesday morning and just having a rough week overall, I'm very excited to head to

Seattle!!!!

ManLosch and I are leaving LoschDog behind and headed to Seattle for a week. We're going to Vancouver for a few days too. I had to go for work so we decided to just actually take a little vacation around it, before I'm not going to want to go anywhere! LoschDog is in good hands with my friend Joey, even though I get sad when I leave his little pup face. But this was a well earned vaca. Super excited. 

Tanning Fail

My mom called me yesterday at work freaking out. She says, "Okay, I have to tell you this because I figured you'd want to know and I know you're going to tell Marcus (my best friend)." I said, "Okay, what happened?" She says, "So I bought one of those self-tanning sprays because I wanted my skin tone to look even before we left for New Orleans. I followed all of the directions- (and please note, I already started laughing once she told me she bought a self-tanning spray)- and exfoliated. I sprayed it on and let it dry, and went to bed. I woke up and I LOOK LIKE A FREAKIN' ZEBRA!!"

I'm sorry, but I responded with what many others might respond with and said, "Ma, did you forget that you're black? Why the hell were you using a self-tanning spray?" She said, "Well my legs were all pasty and my arms were more brown, so I wanted to look good at the music festival." I said, "If you had just put on some sunblock and let Mother Sun do her business, she would have tanned you just fine." She said, "I know, I know. And it's noticeable. I went to get my nails done and the woman said to me, "Uhhhh Harriet...uhh you got too much sun yea?" My mother said that she told her about the self tanner fiasco and that the little Asian woman looked at her and touched her arm and said, "Uhhhhh no. You no need. Not fa' ya skin color, no." I busted out laughing. I said to her, "Ma, you can go work at Lowes or Home Depot. People can use you as a paint palette when deciding what color brown to paint their walls." She about had enough of me and my jokes. I asked her to send me a picture and she adamantly refused.

I love my mama.

Let's Get Physical...Physical...

As in, ManLosch is now in charge of my exercise regimen. He wants to make sure that I'm exercising for the baby. So I said while laying in his lap today, "I should probably do SOME exercise that doesn't involve trips to the fridge. Help me." Since the word "exercise" is on his top 10, his ears perked up and he said, "Ok, sure!" I said, "No matter what it is, you have to make sure I don't pout and say no. You have to make me do it." He said, "Ok, I can handle that."

After I just finished making soup, banana bread, raspberry sorbet, AND washed all those dishes, ManLosch turns to me and says, "Okay, ready to exercise????" I looked at him like he was crazy. He said, "3 days a week now, you have to walk with me and LoschDog." I laughed out loud and said he was funny. He was not laughing. So I said, "Uh...um...we'll see." He said, "Nope. 3 days a week. 15 minutes and we'll walk slow. Also, ready to do some floor exercises now?" WTF?! So considering I DID tell him that he could trump my whining, I slowly made my way to my yoga mat and did some exercises with him. It wasn't too bad. But I did whine a little while doing them (duh, IT'S ME).

Well I'm being rewarded with dinner now, so I like this. I'll do as many wall squats and pelvic thrusts necessary. BRING ON THE FOOD!!!!!

Know That Feeling?

That feeling where you want to shout to the world? That feeling where you just have so much to say, but can't find the words to say it? That feeling that just sits in the pit of your stomach (and no it's not the kid) and you don't know how to manage it?

That feeling where you just feel.......????????

That's what I'm feeling right now. And I wish I could explain it better. But I hope that my blogging family understands sometimes that no matter how much you love to express yourself, sometimes you don't always know the right way to do it or even how to approach it. Today has been one of those days. Meh.