We Takin' Over!!

• Me: (as "Precious" wins something)Do you see how they keep showing all the black people in attendance after someone wins for "Precious?".
• ManLosch: Haha! You're so awful. But yea.
• Me: (as Mo'Nique wins for "Precious") Now THAS' whats up! Black people are taking over the Oscars. Fuck yea!
• ManLosch: This coming from the girl reading "Martha Stewart: Living" while watching the Oscars..
• Me: Shut up. It was free. Hmpmh.

Sale at The Gap

OMG...so it's not so much a sale, but you will be doing a great thing while getting something great in the meantime!

The Gap is recycling old jeans! They don't have to be Gap jeans either. They can be ANNNNNY brand of jeans. You bring them in and you get 30% off your purchase of a new pair of jeans! You also get 35% off if you use your Gap card!! They use the recycled jeans for eco-friendly insulation on new houses.

You know you wanna go get you some new jeans while saving the planet. Mmmmhmmmm.

Oscar Nominated Animated Shorts

So after nearly strangling the taxi driver who didn't know where the ICA was....we made it to see the Oscar Nominated Animated Shorts. I saw the advertisement for it on Sunday when we were at the ICA, and I was interested because normally, you don't ever see these things. Because I'm not a very good reviewer, you will get the Lexi version of my review of each nominee:

French Roast: Eh. This one was about a guy who is in a coffee shop and he realizes he lost his wallet, so to avoid the bill, he just orders more coffee. Mmmmmmyeaaaaa. Wasn't that funny.

The Lady and The Reaper (La Dama y La Muerte): This one was real cute. An old lady is ready to die to meet her hubby in heaven. She actually dies and the reaper comes to get her, but she ends up in the hospital where the doctor saves her life. The cartoon is about the reaper and the doctor both fighting to get her soul. It's pretty awesome and funny.

Wallace and Gromit: A Matter of Loaf and Death: This was funny. This was the longest animated short (at roughly 30 minutes). Wallace falls in love with some psycho woman and Gromit saves him (that's pretty much it). It was funny. A liiiitle adult humor, but otherwise, nothing that made me get out of my seat to clap. This might win off of reputation alone. It's familiar. People are at least aware of the Wallace and Gromit animations, even if they've never seen them.

Granny O'Grimm's Sleeping Beauty: Now I loved this one. A little old grandmother tells her version of Sleeping Beauty to her grandchild. It's pretty hilarious.

Logorama: First, there was a warning it started about violence and adult language and situations. The warning was up there for like 10 minutes (Lexaggeration of course....oh yea, btw...that's my new word). Once it started though, I thought it was amazing. It was a great way to show how commercialism is killing off our society. BUT I could also understand why someone might think it's overkill. This is a possible winner I think.

Now I don't do predictions. I don't know what's going to win. But MY PERSONAL two faves were Logorama and Granny O'Grimm. Good stuff. It was a fun night last night.

The Adventures of Lenti Losch #3

Fuck, I just want a soda.

Barnes and Noble Can Kiss My Ass

I go to Barnes and Noble because I have a membership there. I placed something on hold, something to help me with my writing. When you place something on hold, you can pick it up in the store after they send you the confirmation email that they have it and it's ready.

So I placed something on reserve and this is what I received:

So heeeey bitches, I went to get my shit in Framingham the next day. They told me they reserved a copy in my name and they were holding it for me. I arrive, try to pick it up, and whaddaya know? It's the WRONG thing. So I say, "This isn't what I put on hold." I showed them that the hold paper THEY printed out and wrapped around the item didn't even match. She says, "Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry. Hold on while we go get the right thing." She disappears and returns a few minutes later to tell me THEY DIDN'T HAVE ANY. How the fuck was I able to reserve it then, when it said it was in stock?? So she says, "The Burlington store has it. I'm so sorry. You can buy it there." ManLosch and I get in the car and drive to Burlington from Framingham. We get there and we ask the woman at the Customer Service desk for it (after we told her what happened); because she was 8/10th's retarded, it took her 10 minutes to actually find it in the system; she said they had it, she disappeared to get it, and came back and said they didn't have any.

WHHAAAAT?! I gave her the look of death and as I was walking out, she said, "I can order it for you..." I said, "No thanks."

I sent an email to Barnes and Noble because I was pissed off and it was very detailed about how I thought it was ridiculous that it said it was in stock, AND someone physically placed it on hold. They finally emailed me back, 5 days later.....

"Dear Alexis Losch,
Thank you for your email regarding the "Pick Me Up" feature on the
Barnes & Noble website.  Please accept our sincere apologies that your
experience was a disappointing one.  

Our website asks that our customers contact the store prior to their
visit to verify availability, as our inventory changes frequently.
Besides ensuring that the item can be reserved, the Bookseller can
immediately place the item at the register area, under your name, for
three business days.

We are always looking for ways to enhance customer service in our
stores, and we assure you that we will keep your feedback in mind as we
review the services they provide.

We value your patronage and hope to see you in our stores again soon.


Sincerely,

Enchantia "

Please check the second paragraph. They ask that I call the store prior to picking it up to ensure its availability. ISN'T THAT WHAT PLACING IT ON HOLD IS FOR?! So I place it on hold and I wait for an email. I got the email which means a person physically went to grab what I wanted/what I reserved, printed the paper, and wrapped the paper around the box with a rubber band. Which means that I shouldn't have to call beforehand...because an actual person...put it...on...hold. Right. And the best part? Her name is ENCHANTIA. WHO THE FUCK?! This is how I know this is some bullshit. Thanks Enchantia for your not so accurate email.

Thanks Barnes and Noble. You can take your "Pick Me Up" feature and shove it up Enchantia's enchanted ass.

Bitches!!!!

STOP CLAPPING AT THE END OF YOGA!!!!!!
Sent from my BlackBerry® smartphone with SprintSpeed

The Hour of My Discontent

I had an ATROCIOUS day today. Atrocious is light too. Whatever is worse than atrocious is what my day was today.

So I got home today, spouting alot of obscenities and realized that I needed to do something to take my mind off the day. I decided to do an activity I found on one of my favorite websites Soul Pancake. The activity is to take a page from a newspaper, magazine, or book (or book you wish you never read) and find a poem in it. You're basically crossing out lines until you find what you're looking for. Here is what mine looked like:

Here is the poem that I found in this article:

In the upcoming scenes

There are heartbreaking questions about creative exploitation

You were interesting, actually

Tricky, involved, a narcissist

I wasn't happy.

Hyper-aware about one person's perspective

Playing became performing;

it's our story.

Central to playing ourselves, monogamy overcoming emotions

Spoken, articulate, too pretentious

Torture was so damaging.

Plain Perspective

Today, I dragged ManLosch to the ICA today (Institute of Contemporary Art) in downtown Boston. I heart this place.

So anyway, the exhibits are pretty much mostly on the 4th floor, where you see those lights in the window in the picture above. And if you stand there and look out the window, you can see Charlestown and Logan Int'l Airport. Why is this important? Well because I'll admit now: While I have a ton of mixed emotions about flying, I LOVE watching planes take off and land. Maybe it's the rhythmic orchestration of it all. Maybe I see it as an art form itself.

I like to play this game too when I watch planes take off. I like to guess what a random person in a random seat is doing while taking off, or while in the air. So as I was leaving one exhibit, I stopped to watch a plane take off. ManLosch asked me why I was stopping and I pointed. So I said, "17C...the women is dying for a cigarette and since she's an addict, she's chewing Nicorette and nervously picking at her cuticles. The man next to her is reading a newspaper and wondering why she's picking her cuticles but won't ask her. Your turn." He says, "All of that, but there's a baby in the back of the plane crying. Because there's always a crying baby on a plane." I said, "That's not very imaginative. C'mon be original. You aren't fascinated that when you look out and see a plane taking off, it looks smaller than what it is, but it's got 150-200 people on it all doing different things?" He says, "Not really. I'm more fascinated with how they get that thing in the air."

So now I've come to the point of my entry tonight. Perspective. We're looking at the same exact thing, but we see two completely different things. Because ManLosch is for all intents and purposes, an architect, he sees things structurally and he sees things that need to have an equation for them to make sense. I see a bunch of random shit in random colors and make up random stories about most of what I see. It's just amazing when you have those moments when you realize just how different you are from others. And all it took was an airplane.

What about you? What do you think about/see when you see a plane taking off?

Flickr Photo Project

One blog that I follow posts photo projects every now and then. This month, she posted a photo project where she gave a list of words or phrases and we were left to our own devices to snap shots of what we thought it represented. This was the first time I participated in a project like this and I enjoyed it alot! Check out my 26 things below, and feel free to always check my photos at Flickr.