Jovie is one month old! January 14th was one month and wow....what a month.
What have I learned about being a parent so far?
- Newborn mittens don't do sh*t. Don't bother wasting your money parents-to-be! While they are only like $4 for a 2 or 3 pack, why bother? The aliens we know as our kids don't even like them and they somehow manage to get them off within 1-2 minutes. Invest in the onesies with the fold overs on the end that act as mittens. Jovie is no match for those.
- Swaddling works....as long as said child does not get her hands and arms out of the swaddle. Jovie is a mastermind at getting out of the swaddle, so she startles herself awake.
- Parenthood is nothing like it seems, even with everyone telling you what it will be like.
- Never have a real game plan. Babies like to f&^$ sh*t up. They will look at your beautifully crafted game plan and then take a massive mustardy yellow dump on it, all while smoking a cigar and sending their goons after you (okay I made that last part up but it sounded cool...like that boss baby from Who Framed Roger Rabbit).
- Dogs will either be super pissed and mean or protective and sweet towards new babies. Our dog is the latter. :-)
- Newborns apparently like to be held, so that sandwich you were gonna make? Nope. Put down the mayo Rachael Ray. That nap you wanted to take while they nap? Not possible with a Fourth Trimester baby because she wants to sleep in your arms.
Look, I'm not gonna lie. This is bad. We're tired and Jovie has reflux. Ryan was only ever used to me crying and he was able to soothe me. When Jovie gets going, there is no stopping her. Parenting sucks. Babies can't tell you what's wrong. Our job from now on is like learning how to be a trivia master, forget being a normal human being.......
And I don't think we'd change it back either. As long as Jovie puts us in the best nursing home with buffet lunches and dinners, that's all we need. :)
Aww, so cute! I feel like I am about to run a marathon. It's so interesting to have someone a step or two ahead of me so I can hear about what it's like.
ReplyDeleteGood to know about the mittens. I keep wondering if I should buy them. I have a couple of sweaters with extra-long sleeves, so I guess those will do instead!
We have practiced swaddling a teddy bear. But something tells me swaddling this baby who is now break dancing in my guts is going to be a little different. :)
Have you tried using any kind of baby carrier/sling/wrap? Just curious. It's one of those things I imagine would make things easier... but then again, maybe it wouldn't! I guess we'll find out either way.
Jeannie girl don't bother with the mittens. Or I'll just mail you all the ones Jovie never even touched because why bother? We just kinda let her scratch up her face a little because there's no sense in bothering with the mittens right now.
ReplyDeleteWe practiced swaddling with a bear too. And diapering. And guess what? It's crap until you are trying to diaper a wiggling baby who hates being on the changing table. Swaddling? Great if your baby never moves. You'll learn. Or if Juliana never stays in it? Buy one of the Sleep Sacks that you can automatically swaddle her in. We are now in love with those (and Jovie still manages to get out every now and then).
We have a Baby Bjorn and a Moby. I used the Bjorn the other day while she cuddled up on my chest and was knocked out and didn't want to be bothered. Loved it. We're still figuring out the Moby, as it has to be tight and loose all at the same time. We're almost there. Definitely try one once you know how big Juliana is because it will let you be hands free every now and then.
I won't bother with mittens. I'll just make sure, if we go out or she's scratching, that I put her in extra long sleeves or swaddle her little arms down.
ReplyDeleteI'm hoping we can work with the Moby! I've seen women wearing them successfully, going about their business while their babies sleep peacefully. Once on a train and once at a work party. I hope I can swing it like those mamas--and that my husband figures out how to wear it, too! I can imagine it would make life a lot easier.