New Digs

So I now have a 2nd blog.

http://64in365.blogspot.com

Check it out. Become a follower. Love my list. But don't forget about this blog. Because both will be equally as delicious.

Smooches,
Sha-trexis

#14

Sooooo you can expect these kinds of gem-like postcards from me over the next 365 days!!!
Sent from my BlackBerry® smartphone with SprintSpeed

64 Things

My beautiful followers, I have created a list! In the last few days or so, I decided that my current being had no current path, no purpose. I wanted to experience some personal growth, I wanted to learn new things, and I wanted to have fun. So I created a list. It's a list of 64 things that I must try to complete in the next 365 days. The list I am about to share with you is open for interpretation, it's open for participation (if you decide you want to join me, you will most likely be welcome to, but please just ask first), and most of all, it's open for you all to comment on. I want your help, I want your feedback. I am still deciding if I will create a 2nd blog for my 64 things, and if I do, you will all be informed so you can follow that too.

And now...drumroll please.....I present to you, my 64 Things:

1. Take a creative writing class (no specified length or price).
2. Write a letter to my dad and actually send it.
3. Take more photos (1 roll/month).
4. Get 10 more people to follow my blog.
5. Go to the gym 2-3 times/week.
6. Go camping for 1 night (must try to include fishing).
7. Drink less soda (5/business week).
8. Throw a dart on a map of the United States and visit that place (I do get 3 throws however).
9. Watch movies for 1 full day (suggestions are welcome).
10. Find a way to order "Lift" online and have it shipped to my house.
11. Fly to Chicago to visit my in-laws just because.
12. See a therapist.
13. Build and paint a bookcase from scratch (can have help).
14. Send 5 postcards a month to anyone.
15. Learn how to make greeting cards. Try to sell them to my Mom's friends.
16. Try 20 new restaurants in Boston.
17. Buy a homeless person dinner (try to sit with them during dinner).
18. Draw something in a notebook everyday (no matter how ugly it is).
19. Visit another state to see a concert.
20. Buy a 18x24 (subject to change) canvas. Paint with eyes closed.
21. Fry my own chicken.
22. Donate work clothes to a battered woman's shelter.
23. Take Jordan to a dog park once a week.
24. Throw a wine and appetizer party that's dressy and fancy.
25. Visit California.
26. Meditate in the Boston Common/Public Garden (with friends, alone, etc.).
27. Save $20 or more from each paycheck.
28. Learn how to play a round of real golf
29. Be an awesome person (being aware of others around me, being calmer).
30. Cook 4 times a week.
31. Surprise my mom at work one day.
32. Write down the names of 20 people I know. Write them a letter expressing my gratitude towards them.
33. Choose 10 bible readings and blog about them (doesn't have to be all at once).
34. Learn how to play the piano.
35. Watch all 2009 Best Picture nominee movies from the Oscars.
36. Try to volunteer at an animal shelter.
37. Take a picture of something that represents each letter of the alphabet (should have 26 pictures). Frame these pictures how I choose.
38. Ride the Red line and Blue line from one end to the other (on the T).
39. Eat buffalo wings in Buffalo, NY.
40. Go to synagogue on a Friday night.
41. Learn how to cook beef stroganoff (because I love my mom-in-laws stroganoff).
42. Organize a Boston pub crawl over the summer.
43. Rent a car for the day. Only make left turns. Explore.
44. Go to a flea market. Find 2 bracelets that are alike and mail one to my mom with an explanation of it's meaning.
45. Attend 5 book readings.
46. Write a letter to the Metro (newspaper) explaining my 64 things journey and hope they publish it.
47. Read a book about architecture.
48. Surprise a friend with an hour body massage (given by a professional) and lunch.
49. Cook dinner for my mother or grandmother.
50. Explore poetry. Find a writer that I enjoy and share what I learn and like.
51. Get a list of words from 1 person and write a short story that incorporates the words.
52. Go to 7 museums that have contemporary art or at least a few contemporary exhibits.
53. Cook for my co-workers.
54. Volunteer at a soup kitchen.
55. Watch 5 foreign films in the movie theatre.
56. Create a "mannequin" commercial similiar to the Old Navy commercials.
57. Learn guitar (preferably bass).
58. Go on a spiritual/meditative retreat.
59. See a Yankees game at New Yankee Stadium.
60. Design/Draw 10 things. Put them on t-shirts and wear them proudly.
61. Drive to Montreal, Canada. Explore.
62. Find 10 photobooths in 10 different places. Can take pics with friends or alone.
63. See Niagara Falls. Take inappropriate photos.
64. Buy a bike helmet. Bike around the Charles River (not all the way around, but in different places around the river).

My list became complete today and therefore, I have until May 8, 2010 to complete this list. Remember, you can help and participate too! Wish me luck! :)

Shama-lama-ding-dong

I went to yoga last night (hold your applause please). I went to the gym TWICE that day. Once in the morning and then in the evening for yoga. However, I will note that the only reason I ended up at the gym was because we had no hot water at our house and I wasn't going to take another cold shower. So I also rode the stationary bike before showering. Still. Props to me (NOW you may applaud).

So yoga right? We have a new instructor. Her name is Nina. And she was WAY better than the yoga sergeant sub we had last week. Nina was very calming and motherly. She didn't favor downward dog (THAAAANK YOUUU) and reminded us that "this your OWN yoga practice. do what feels right for you." She also played some cool music that was very yoga-ish and made me want to start singing "shama-lama-ding-dong" while slapping my hands on the floor. But I refrained and kept with my yoga practice for 55 minutes. But the two gossipy people (guy and girl) were there that I don't care for (which is my nice way of saying that they can eat dirt) and I got there WAY before they did and they kinda looked at me with an evil glance because I got the spot in the corner in the back (which is where they usually roost). Suck it up Laverne and Shirley and get there in time to put your mats down to save your spot. And moisturize your heels while you're at it Rambo.

I'm also not down with the people who don't bring their own mats. If you all are gonna freak out about swine flu and shit, BRING YOUR OWN MAT. Do you really wanna do Child's Pose on that mat where someone just put their sweaty feet?

Namaste.

15 years and counting....

I love my best friend.

Shut the Hell Up Lexi

So I'm going on vacation starting May 16th. Let me tell you, I'm beginning to think that I may just grab whatever I can and mysteriously NOT return to Massachusetts. Don't take one step closer! I'll do it. I'll not return.

In celebration of the fact that I won't be in Massachushits for a week (!!!!!), I've decided to tell you what I plan on doing. I actually may have gotten more done or had more fun here at home, but eh....any day that you get paid to not work is a fun day to me. So the hubby and I are going on a roadtrip. Driving from here to Florida. We're going down for a wedding that we're in and decided that-

Currently listening to: "Be Gentle With Me" by the boy least likely to

..Sorry, sometimes I have ADD. Anyway. We decided that driving down was ultimately cheaper than flying from point A to point Q. We're stopping in VA to visit my brother and sister-in-law (they're in the Air Force..they are important...they do lots of big and secret things), then going to see my girl Kim in NC. We're gonna tour around Duke (she works there) and we have skimmed the idea of visiting my Grammie. However, only for an hour. When she visits us, she pulls that "Rub a dub dub, thanks for the grub....ok we're going to Atlantic City now, BYE!" After that, it's a drive with stops, but heading straight to Miami, I think. Who knows? But I DO know this: we ARE DEFINITELY stopping at South of the Border.

What is South of the Border you ask? No, we aren't going to Mexico. It's this most awesomely cheesy place on the state line between North Carolina and South Carolina that is nothing short of a calamitous atrocity. And I love it. It's just so great. And I promise that this will be my last photo.

Anyway, I just wanted to inform you lovely readers that I'll be on vacation shortly. Am I excited? I've been more excited at other events, but yes, I will be especially happy to see my bro and my good friends. And don't worry. I'll be blogging that week too.

And I'll even take my own stock photos of South of the Border for you. :)

...and you all laughed....

You know what?!?!?! WE'VE FINALLY HAD OUR DAY!!!!!!

Booyah bitches!!

33 things you didn't ever care to know about me

1. If a song comes on during a movie that I know, I sing it out loud. In the theatre. (I ignore all evil glances)
2. Cooking is therapeutic for me
3. I have a thing for Polaroids (and Polaroids have a thing for me)
4. I am NOT a happy person. I am a pessimist and enjoy dark, twisted, and gross humor.
5. However, when I smile, I think I'm decently pretty.
6. I used to think I was the only kid who thought their parents getting a divorce was a great thing. Now I know I'm not the only one.
7. Coral became my favorite color when I wore a dress in that color and someone told me I was pretty.
8. I skipped class more in undergrad than I did in high school.
9. I broke up with my elementary and middle school boyfriends all because I didn't want to kiss them.
10. I, ultimately, then, had my first kiss in 10th grade (yea I was a late one, but I sho' nuff caught up)
11. I don't like people who, when getting on an airplane, steal the blanket and pillow from Seat 12D because they are afraid they won't have a blanket or pillow when they get to their backrow seat.
12. I lost a baby tooth in 7th grade eating a Jolly Rancher in 3rd period English. I was so afraid to ask to leave I sat there with a Jolly Rancher, a tooth, and a bloody mouth until I went to Woodshop next period.
13. Walking home, some kid threw a glass bottle at me in 7th grade too. Yea.
14. Middle school, overall, was just tragic.
15. I punched a vending machine once. Still did not get said snack. But did hurt said hand.
16. When I was a kid, I wanted to be a doctor. Then an obstetrician. Then I realized I was too stupid to be a doctor and decided I wanted to be a psychologist. Then I decided I was too dumb to be a psychologist and decided to be an elementary ed teacher. Then I decided I was too impatient for that and decided to be a college administrator.
    
17. I played soccer in high school. Then I decided I wasn't an athlete at all. So I stuck with marching band.
18. I like beer, tequila, and Jack. Thanks.
19. I lose gloves like a girl on Maury just lost her virginity.
20. If I'm on a plane, sometimes I picture myself crashing, and that eases the anxiety of picturing myself crashing (yea I know......twisted and horrible).
21. I tried Lean Cuisines once and hated the one I had.
22. The first college party I went to had soap on the floor and I immediately left.
23. I prefer dogs over cats, but still want a cat.
24. I don't like tuna sandwiches.
25. Visiting Rome was probably the most walking I'd ever done in my entire life.
26. I like coming up with nicknames for people. Sometimes they stick, sometimes they don't.
27. I like school. I like discussions.
28. I used to work in Admissions. I learned some very valuable life skills from that alone.
29. I am extremely photogenic.
30. I don't like eating the edges of sandwiches, the ends of subs, or drinking the last bit of something.
31. I glare at my husband anytime he eats loudly or drinks loudly. I also glare at him when he crosses his legs.
    
32. I had my very first pair of eyeglasses stolen as a kid. I cried when I had to go home and tell my parents.
33. I saw Depeche Mode in concert. Twice. (Yea......yea......don't ask)
    

Why 33? Because I said so. That's why.

You Know You Had One

There's no possible way you could have made it through elementary school or even middle school for some without.....................

The Trapper Keeper.

How awesome were Trapper Keepers, right?! You could organize your entire life in those things. You were able to organize your work into sections, place all your 3 ring folders in there, and keep all those notes that your boyfriend/girlfriend wrote to you during class that you just couldn't get rid of. And there were so many designs too! What girl didn't have the Lisa Frank Trapper Keeper? What boy didn't want a cool Trapper Keeper that would show off their not yet developed machismo? Wanna know what MY Trapper Keeper was used for? I had to put it up everytime I had to take a test so the kid next to me wouldn't cheat off of me (because my elementary school was too poor to actually have space enough where we weren't sitting on top of each other). It seemed to take awhile for teachers to figure out that while we were putting these up to prevent others from cheating, we OURSELVES used our nifty Trappers to include all the notes for the test and flip through them during the test, which essentially aided in our own downward spiral into personal dishonesty.

My generation loved you, oh Trapper Keeper. Maybe you'll make a comeback and show the kids today how it's done. You saved my life Trapper Keeper.....ok maybe not, but you definitely organized my work through the beginning of 7th grade; until I realized that colorful binders with velcro were NOT the coolest thing to carry home with you. You could get jumped for that shit.

Please take a moment to remember your Trapper Keeper, and if you had one, feel free to share with me and the world anything about it (and no, Mead is NOT paying me for this).


**A good friend sent this to me after reading this blog, so here's the 1st edit. Have fun!!

..but the world MUST know that I....

So since my workplace banned Facebook, I have not been on it as much as I used to. Considering when I get home, I'm usually tired and don't care that 100 of my friends changed the "About Me" section of their pages or changed their Relationship status 3 times in one day. From the times I've logged in, I've noticed a constant. People are falling ill with the TMI disease. If you don't know what TMI stands for, it's "Too Much Information," but honestly, if you're reading my blog, you should already know that (considering that I often offer up too much information about MY life). But I'm talking about pictures of your pee stick when you found out you were pregnant, that Robbie now has the syph because he cheated on you...etc. So I decided there should be a rule book of examples of inappropriate Facebook statuses. Below, you will find some examples of things that fall into the TMI disease category (or anything that may be considered just inappropriate for sharing on Facebook:

Anonymous Male/Female User:
.....is currently taking a dump. And totally ran out of toilet paper.
.....is PREGNANT! Take a look at the proof baby!! (see inset photo of pee stick)
.....is with his/her therapist working out his/her daddy issues. Pass the tissues.
.....is currently being stabbed.
.....is currently being arrested. Post bail ASAP.
.....is wondering why her roommate must be so loud during sex. Honestly, he's not THAT good in bed. TRUST ME.
.....is at his/her grandma's funeral. And she didn't leave me anything either. :(
.....is currently hijacking a plane/robbing a bank bitches! Rock on! (side note: you KNOW at one point in your flying career that you've seen that ONE idiot who never turns their phone off during the flight and you want to shank them so bad. but that's another blog.)
.....has JUST gotten laid. I am AWESOME.
.....is taking an STD test at Planned Parenthood right now. Wish me luck!
.....just farted in his/her cubicle.
.....is waiting for the divorce papers to be signed already!
.....wishes the bank would stop calling for their money. He/she just ain't got it.
.....is up in the gym, just workin on his/her fitness...but just farted on the elliptical.
.....just drank a bottle of tequila while at ::hiccup:: work.
.....called in sick to play football with said homies (note: your boss is your friend on facebook)


If you've seen any inappropriate/TMI statuses on Facebook, or can think of anything that might be just as horrific, please, by all means, leave a message. We will stop these overzealous Facebookers, one stroke at a time.






(I meant one KEYSTROKE you pervs. Like typing? Get your mind out the gutter.)

Sharing is Caring...

...or not getting pummeled by 5,840 pounds of steel, plastic, and glass. In other words:



I've tried to be patient. I've tried to just suck it up. But I can't anymore. If you ride a bicycle in the Commonwealth of Massachusetts, SHARE THE F*&!ING ROAD!!!!!!! There's even a flashing sign now on my way to work to remind us all to share the road. But I've found that bicyclists love to create their own rules. That they can be a car when they want and a pedestrian when they want. For example, not following traffic lights and weaving in and out of cars causing people to slam on their brakes. You, awful cyclist, obviously can't go the speed limit, so move over to the side of the road as close to the curb as you can. I don't WANT to hit you, but so help me, next time you don't move over and follow the rules, you can expect a headlight hanging from your helmet.

Things I Don't Want to Buy in Bulk at Costco

Everyone likes buying things in bulk. There's a certain level of joy knowing that you won't be buying toilet paper or fruit snacks for months. However, while previously walking through Costco, I realized that there are a few things that I either would NEVER want to buy at Costco, or just things that I'd never want to buy in bulk at Costco.

• Caskets
• Hamsters or Rabbits (can you imagine how many you might have in a few months?!)
• Immigrants
• Babies
• Passports
• A House
• Office Chairs
• Bibles
• Dentures
• Bounce Houses
• Powdered Milk
• Tickle-Me Elmo's
• Holy Water
• Season 1 of ChiP's on DVD (really, what was the point of that show?)
  

Love for my Stomping Grounds

I miss UM (University of Miami....not University of Michigan). And when I say I miss it, I really mean that I miss EVERYTHING. Including said overheard conversations from one of my favorite sites. Here are a few to share (and maybe now you'll all want to visit!):

Now I Only Eat It
Dude #1: So, when the hell did you start smoking cigarettes?
Dude #2: Last week.
Dude #1: Why the hell did you do that?
Dude #2: I wanna stop smoking pot.

University of Miami
Miami, Florida

Overheard by: Stosh
via Overheard Everywhere, Mar 7, 2008


Well, We Do Have a Couple Of Pre-op Trannies
Girl: Oh, I'm doing Zumba today at five.
Guy: What's Zumba? Can I do Zumba?
Girl: Well...you can.
Guy: I can?
Girl: Yeah, it's not like there's a sign that says "No penises allowed."
Guy: But "no penises" is implied.

University of Miami
Florida
via Overheard Everywhere, Apr 21, 2009


Pythagoras Is a Jealous God, People
Math teacher: If you fuck with numbers, you're fucking with god! And people get killed for that shit!
Overheard by: Tormented Math Student
via Overheard Everywhere, Jan 29, 2009



But srsly, I got 2 degrees from there, I turned out fine. :)

Believable or Not???

Any suggestions?

Leave it At Your Desk

Dear Employees (of any company, school, etc):

It is inappropriate to bring your coffee mug (or any other food item on that note) into the restroom.
Do you not realize the action that goes on in the restrooms? Do you not realize that all of that is seeping into your coffee????? Do you really plan on bringing that half sandwich back to your desk and eating it now, along with that coffee??

Please rearrange your stops so the coffee/lunch/conversation that could have waited ends up on your desk before visiting the lavatories to take care of whatever your business may be.

Thank you.

Sincerely,
The Employee who Leaves Things at Her Desk

Things people 65 & over should NOT do

So my best friend (Marcus) and I decided to come up with a list together of things people 65 & over shouldn't do. It may not be a fair list, but really, think about it. Then picture one of your grandparents doing it. I guarantee it's not pretty.

• Drop down and get their eagle on
• Wear anything resembling the "business" of the opposite sex
• Buy/adopt cats and give them names that sound like they have a mothball scent attached to it, like Mittens or Buttons
• Procreation
• Heavy lifting
• Tanning (naturally in the sun or in a salon)
• Take steroids
• Build evil robots to take over the world
• Buy a Lil Wayne or Lady Gaga CD
• Ride sleds
• Be on Facebook or use Twitter (Interests: Boost, Days of Our Lives, Bingo...)
• Drive
• Get drunk/high (but this may actually be quite humorous)
• Get a weave
• Wear anything with the word "Juicy" on it (bonus points if it's spelled out in rhinestones)
• Wear thongs or speedos
• Do body shots
• Use a gas stove to cook ("Cecil....how long have the beans been on???")
  

Nuevo!

Check out the nuevo-ness of the blog. Hope you like the changes coming at 'cha.

Boo- tothe-yah.

It's Hot

Being mobile is awesome. It let's me share with you all that I'm sweltering right now sitting in this rental car(I'm in Miami). I can barely blog because my hands are so damn sweaty. Save me Jeebus.
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I'm Mobile!!

I'm mobile too b*tches!!!! Holllllerrrrrrrrrr
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Errplane

I thought exposing these three stories was appropriate considering that I will be flying to Miami tomorrow morning. Who wouldn't be intrigued by snakes on a plane, a man urinating on a woman during a flight, and a man driving through the gates of a runway up to a plane because he said he needed to get to Israel because he had all "the answers." I hit the jackpot in terms of timing.

Let's just hope I can have minimal incidents this weekend.