I Am In Love

Thanks to my good friend Joey (who I miss so so much) for posting this on my Facebook wall.......

The Day That Shall Live in Infamy

Last weekend, we were in Toys R Us picking out a present for my friend's daughter's birthday. I sighed loudly that Jovie still didn't have a doll. She had stuffed toys, but not a doll. Not the ultimate in declaring your child a true female. For some reason, it bothered me that she didn't have a doll to coo over. So we went about finding her her first doll.

Now, why did this throw me into a complete tailspin? Because there are no multi-racial dolls! The dolls are White, Black, Hispanic, or Asian. The hispanic doll came the closest, but that wasn't a true representation of who she was. If we got her the white doll, would she identify herself as white first? If we got her the black doll, would she identify herself as black first? Would she shun one of her races? Would she think she wasn't pretty enough because there are no dolls made in her color?

All of this went through my head as I had an anxiety attack in the aisles, running back and forth between the dolls. Jovie happily tried to pull toys off the shelf and Ryan kept talking about getting her a Cabbage Patch Doll. See, we both had Cabbage Patch Dolls growing up, so this was the perfect solution. Until it WASN'T the perfect solution; there were races of those little bastards too!

We ended up settling on the Black Cabbage Patch that came with 2 dolls; one little sister and one big sister. The little one has a little tuft of nappy curly hair on it's head and the bigger one has curly black hair. We were so proud of our purchase and when Ryan spent 30 minutes trying to wrangle them from the packaging, with Jovie wide-eyed in excitement, we were sure she'd be proud of her parents. She grabbed the dolls and flung them before toddling off to the next activity.

So yes....her attention span is still short, but she does play with them. Once she even coo'ed at the baby. I still worry about how she'll identify herself in the future or if she'll get teased in school. I worry about all those identity crises I read about for multi-racial kids and how that can affect them. All I can do is treat her like the beautiful little girl she is and keep reinforcing that. And try to keep her from biting the nose off her Cabbage Patch.

Leap Year Post

In all honesty, I only really wanted to post something to say that I posted something on February 29th. Nothing more, nothing less. So here it is. :)

Although, I did feel like since it IS the extra day, that today would either be exceptionally awful or exceptionally great. Neither has happened so far, so I suppose that could be a good thing. I would prefer exceptionally great though.

Happy Leap Year.

Gone But Not Forgotten

I've been sick the last few weeks and I have no clue what the hell is wrong with me. I've been back and forth to the doctor. I'm going again this Friday. All I know is that I'm sooo tired. I have some things to post so give me time and they shall come.

Otherwise, we're all just surviving this Texas life. Maybe that's the problem. Either way, I want to be on the road to healthy ya'll! It will happen. Not sure when, but it will happen.

What I Spend My Day Doing

Wanted: A Vacation

It appears as if the true meaning of vacation is lost. When I stated today that I needed a vacation, it was answered with a "Why's that?" Vacations help you recharge, breathe some new air, gain new perspective at times. When I'm then met with no real response, it tells me this:

America, what is going on? I value hard work and success, but I also value my health and well-being. I think lately I've been  forgetting what it feels like to be AND feel truly healthy. Should I feel that tied to my career that I can't do anything for myself or with my family?

Having Jovie made me realize that above all, my family comes first. My selfish days are done and now I'm accountable. That means bringing my A-game to my daughter and husband ALL THE TIME and I have not been doing that. Time to make some changes. LEEEEEEEGO!!

Ruined Birthday Surprise

ManLosch has a birthday coming up. On Tuesday in fact. I was struggling with the perfect gift and I finally thought of it: A weekend trip to Dallas to do a specific architecture walking tour and a night in a hotel suite so once we put Jovie to bed, we can sit out in the living area and watch TV without waking her. We'd also do other family activities like going to the hotel pool, and see a few other architecturally significant places (a sculpture garden by his most favorite living architect, Renzo Piano).

Sounds good for the archinerd right?

Well last night as we were getting Jovie ready for bed, he started flipping through one of many XXXX-Large architecture books (ones that cause us to carefully divide them in boxes because when moving, they all can barely be lifted). He blurts out, "Man we need to get to Dallas so I can see this building" and points to the sculpture garden (or maybe it was something else). He then starts going on about how he was hoping to get there this year since Dallas isn't terribly far in the overall scheme of traveling WITHIN the state of Texas.

I gave him the evil eye and then just smiled. Busted. He said, "What?? What's wrong?" So I caved. It's easier to plan weekend trips when the boy knows about it, so I told him my plan and he felt AWFUL!! He apologized and swore up and down that he didn't know, and I know he had no clue. But it's kinda funny how he's still able to read my mind just a little bit more than I'd like at times.

He is currently excited about these potential plans and has fully taken over. I guess it's not such a bad thing. Happy Early Birthday ManLosch.

Best Thing Said All Week

While I was talking to Ryan yesterday, I explained that I thought God had forgotten me (loooong story people, you'll get the unedited version another time). He said, "No he didn't." I asked, "Well why am I in such a shitty place right now? Nothing feels like it's going right." I explained how there a lot of people in the world he has to talk to and maybe he forgot about me too. I asked why he can't just make everything happen to ensure we can live happy lives like he wants us to.

Ryan's response? "Lex, God is not a micromanager."

Brilliant.

Losing Myself

Ya'll.....I've lost it a little.

I've lost alot of who I am over the last few weeks and it's taking me a bit to figure it all out before I can truly write something with substance and direction. I'm a bit in survival mode and all I ask from you, dear readers, is a little bit of love and strength.

Much love. Be back soon. :)

Forever Lazy

I fell culprit to yet another "As Seen On TV" product. The most recent product was the Snuggie, if you remember that December. Now....it's like the Snuggie on steroids. It's the "Forever Lazy."

YES. I wanted it. And I joked about wanting it with Ryan and he refused to get it for me.....

Until now....

Ladies and Gentleman....the Forever Lazy. This thing took FOREVER to get here, but this was part of my birthday gift. People, this thing has a hood. This thing even has a butt flap zipper so you don't even have to take this bad boy off. It has pockets and it came with matching slipper socks. Now, Ryan ordered pink for me but they were out of stock. When you order, it comes with two of these things. So when I opened the box and saw 3 boxes, I was thinking, "Oh I got a third one."

Nope.

These angels sent me A SNUGGIE for waiting so long and not being able to send pink. So I have 2 blue Forever Lazy's AND another Snuggie. I own 3 Snuggies now.

The ONLY thing that is questionable is the "Lazy General's Warning" which is coming from "P.J. the Koala" (their fun fact is that koalas are the laziest animal on the planet..is this true?). The warning is:

" If at any time while wearing the Forever Lazy you start to experience feelings of energy and/or ambition, please seek medical attention immediately!"

Uhh...there's no disclaimer on that. Now if you know Americans, like I know Americans (and I KNOW me some Americans), some asshat is going to call 911 in a panic because he/she started "doin stuff" instead of being lazy. So in hindsight, placing this on the box was probably not a very good idea. 

I have an extra one, anyone wanna party?

New SNL Favorite

I'm a bit in love with this...

I Want To Change My Name

If this guy can change his name, then so can I.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/01/06/beezow-doo-doo-zopittybop_n_1190410.html?ref=crime&ir=Crime

Um excuse me, did you say your name is Beezow Doo-Doo Zopittybop-Bop-Bop?????? Shut the f*&! up please.

You may now all refer to me as LeLo Dingleclop-di-doo-dop McNaglefirshen. Thanks. And I will respond to nothing short of that name.

In Which I Become A Hater

Beyonce gave birth last night to the new queen of the world, Ivy Blue. 'Twas a C-section. Ok. Great.

Jay-Z and Beyonce rented out an ENTIRE floor at a NYC hospital and she checked in under a pseudonym. Clearly that did nothing since we all know their biznazz. But an entire floor? Millions of dollars for an entire floor? If you need that much privacy, just have the doctor come to your palatial apartment/mansion/rodeo ranch. I'm going to hope that other women needing to give birth didn't get turned away for this. Or I'll hope that it's really just a rumor. But either way....yes I fully admit that I'm a HATERRRRR. I drank the haterade and it is good. Compared to my birthing experience, which yea I spent 16 hours without food and with the knowledge that my kid was about to wreck some shit up....who WOULDN'T want the red carpet rolled out for them? This kid is going to be even greater than the coming of Suri Cruise. We hound their private lives for a glimpse of what it might be like as them or even as their offspring.

But do I really want to know? Because I'll just see that their kid is dressed in really expensive onesies while my kid is in Carter's...and not even SEAN CARTER's. (I do love me some good sales at Carter's though, not gonna lie). There's the hint of jealousy, there's the "I wish I had a bajillion dollars to provide for my family."

But at the end of the day, the only pictures floating on the internet of my beautiful little girl will be because I posted them there, not some ignorant fool trying to run me off the road for a picture. My middle-class lifestyle (if that) suits me just fine. My car works to get us to work and lets us have fun on the weekend. Jovie gets to experience daycare without a flood of stories out about her ("Breaking news! Jovie stole Mikey's toy while he was crossing the classroom. What are Ryan and Lexi teaching her at home?!") and we get to sit on the couch like most Americans after she's in bed and just enjoy the rest of the day.

And still.....I hate.

Of Thee I Zing #1

So Laura Ingraham has a thing it seems with anything on television that is not affiliated with Fox News. Is the worst in television really Victoria Secret's commercials, talking baby commercials, and erectile dysfunction commercials? I don't think it's as bad as it appears. Now don't get me wrong, seeing the latest VS model walking a runway for new lacy lingerie doesn't make me feel COMPLETELY beautiful, but everyone looks good on tv. And I don't have money for a personal trainer and chef, so my post-baby body, even a year from birth won't look that good. But some women do look that good. And it doesn't bother me that they're on tv. And I won't let me child watch enough tv to truly get into those types of commercials, soooo what's the big problem here? Sex sells. Always has. Always will.

And come on! The e-trade baby is just funny. It's funny because trying to figure out what your baby is thinking or trying to say is frustrating enough. So to see a baby performing adult business transactions is funny. That's all it's meant to be. Unless your kids (the kids you have without being married, Ms. Roman Catholic) were talking right out the womb. Mine wasn't. So I find this, and probably always will, entertaining. It makes me no less stupid or human.

Dudes also need a little help sometimes. All commercials for ANY drug are awful if you want to go that route. Yes, it may be selling sex, but who doesn't enjoy good sex? But then can't that be said for anything else? By selling rheumatoid arthritis medication, aren't you selling a pain-free existence? An anti-depressant is selling happiness and peace. It's not a big deal. If your kids are up watching it, that's the parents' fault right there. Control what's on the television. But advertising helps sales. Period.

I'll save my rant about more television she hates for #2....

So many problems with this....

I received an email from YouTube today. I mean, I completely believe that this is totally legit:

kisusu843 has sent you a message:

see this man...

To:101mattlewis,123jessy100,

Anonymous04321,CarynAlive,Ches4107,DistractedWhiteDude,KeepStrummingAway,KidwithSmurf,KiruWolf2000,MarcoXMiddlesex,Pin33appl3,TheSafyann,TheTroypay018,cr1mec0mmit3r,gastong16,holyangel117,msamb37,paulinabajka,sfl702,todclare

howdy mate there bud,

how are you, i was just looking at your videos and i love them.
have you ever thought about getting noticed ? i can give ya a
tip that wud get ya started its a site that you can get as many
video views as you want. i love it and my friends are after getting loads
of views off it..here it is.

subs4subs.com

you shud deffintly check it out.

paddy

Let me start off by telling you, that I changed the link so you wouldn't click on it (because someone would) and get sent somewhere or spammed or whatever. But yes, that was the email sent above. Let's dissect this shall we?

 Look at the people it was sent to. "Distracted White Dude." "Kid with Smurf." C'mon. Add in all the ones with  random numbers and things that don't make sense and there's no EFFIN way I really believe this email right out the gate.

"Howdy mate there bud?" Please just stop now.

The videos I have posted....I can get noticed? So all the videos of my baby learning how to do shit can get noticed?? Right. You asstard, you haven't even looked at them (or am I calling an automated computer an asstard?). Plus only other people with young babies care about those or my kid's grandparents. So no, not even America's Funniest Home Videos worthy, but thanks for noticing.

Your attempt at the spelling of "would" is "wud." I can't even begin to tell you how ignorant you are. Then the nice little doozy at the end... "shud" and "deffintly." Paddy, let me ask you, did you make it past the 3rd grade?

Paddy, if you send me your real address, I'll mail you my kids' "My Baby Can Read" books and DVD's that my mom gave us. That might help you with the English language and also to realize that YOU AREN'T REAL.