So as all you women know, whenever we need to use the ladies room, there is usually a line. So I was waiting to use a stall in the Natick mall yesterday and one opened up and the one right next to it opened up too, so my mom went in that one. The minute I stepped in, I was hit with waves (not just one), of other-stinky-person's-poop. Like this women must have just eaten at the food court upstairs and then exploded. So I could barely breathe and then it hit me: Wonder if the next person who comes in after me thinks it was ME?!?!?! Because I didn't do it, all I have to do is empty my pea sized bladder (thanks KidLosch). It smelled so bad that it wasn't even like the next person could ignore it...it was lingering even in the toilet paper.
So I came out and so did my mom and SHE said, "Man, the woman before me blew it UP!!" I said, "No that was the girl before me in my stall." And we literally argued back and forth about whose stall was worse. We came to the conclusion that they were also a mother-daughter duo who instead of tinkling, just ate Sarku Japan instead and duo dumped. But still, people might think it was me! I will reiterate that I KNOW this is irrational, but you can't tell me that you haven't thought the same thing.
I hate pooping in public rr's or at work...I have been known to hold it until I am septic. Not healthy, not healthy at all. But I don't want my dookie stinking up the joint. That's just the way it is. SOoooooOoOOoo I think we all know that at one point or another we are all doing to take a lethal dump, it's human.
ReplyDeleteBut I don't want people smelling my mess...so I always carry a little purse size perfume to at least attempt to mask the odor of my tragedy.
Bleh.
Those of us who work in offices with only one small bathroom probably share that fear as well. When I go in and our closet of a bathroom is rank, I find myself hoping that no one will come in until I'm safely back at my desk and cannot be blamed for the odor. Of course, no one ever says anything, but you know they think it, because frankly, I do.
ReplyDeleteI hate doing any pee or poop in public restrooms, but I remember when I was pregnant, my aversion got less and less until I didn't care anymore.
ReplyDeleteAs for the baby being born bald... that's the norm. My baby was so hairy, like a little ape-baby. He even had hair curling on his ears (that eventually fell off) and LONG hair on his head (didn't fall off) all curly and black.
All the other babies in the nursery were bald, and my hairy little kid really stood out.
But, if that's what you really want, may your little baby be born with a lush, full, head of hair. I hereby wish it for you.
Let it be done.