Did you see "Where The Wild Things Are?" Because I did with ManLosch Saturday evening. And let me tell you. That movie bordered inappropriate for kids halfway through the movie and then moved right on into inappropriate before the movie was over. As we were walking out, some kid turned to his grandparents and said "That wasn't exciting at all. Where were all the exciting parts?" That's right kid. THERE WEREN'T ANY. Unless you want to be scarred for life by watching monsters who threaten to eat kids and then become friends with them, and then try to eat them again and then say you're sorry. What IS this, Bobby and Whitney's relationship??? No thank you. "Where The Bipolar Things Happen To Reside" should have been more like it. And the kid?? Listen up MAX, you need therapy. A few years of it. No kid's imagination is THAT effed. I'm serious.
I can tell you where the wild things WERE though. At flippin' Mass this morning. ManLosch and I sat through 45 minutes of watching these two sisters beat the shit out of each other, while the mother tried to separate the two. Her first attempt included a shove to the blonde one, and then a threat to the husky brunette one. Then they tried to step on each other. Then they tried to smack each other behind the mother's back. And to top it off, during the recessional hymn, an old man in the front pew gave the crucifix at the altar a big thumbs up. Yes. The man gave Jesus a thumbs up. First he did the sign of the cross, and then gave an approving thumbs up. My eyes widened and I looked at ManLosch, poked him, and he was already smiling, so he saw it too. I couldn't help but laugh out loud.
I think I saw more exciting things at church than the movie. I'm just sayin'.
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